Fork off

By Michael J. Smith on Friday June 22, 2012 10:56 PM

The rather charming lady shown above is admonishing her audience -- members of something called the National Association of Latino Elected and Appointed Officials, God help us -- to finish their lunch quickly, because the Secret Service wanted to collect their silverware before the God-Emperor Obie I favored them with the sunshine of His divine presence.

Having a President around, apparently, is as bad as being on an airplane these days(*). One has to take airplanes occasionally, but who in his right mind would ever willingly find himself within miles of a President?

Evidently this is standard, though not universal practice -- confiscating the cutlery, I mean. One rather suspects that we heard about it on this occasion because some of the Latino Elected And Appointed Officials felt it as a slight. Perhaps because they still have a Mediterranean sense of honor, bless 'em -- something the rest of us have entirely lost. Whatever you say, Officer. Just how far do you want me to bend over?

Excessive, you say? Not at all. Essential. That Marcusian notion of repressive tolerance is sound, as characterizing a moment in history; but the strategy won't work over the long haul. There is really no alternative to repressive repression. People simply cannot be allowed to imagine that they have any dignity at all. It's a matter of national security.

I note with amusement that the cutlery ban is lifted for some trusted audiences, notably the White House Correspondents' Dinner. Shows good sense. Lord knows the Emperor has nothing to fear from the Free Press(tm).


(*) Everybody who lives in New York knows this. Dignitaries and their motorcades are a plague of locusts in this town, especially when the UN is in session, and US Presidents are the worst of all. The whole damn place goes into lockdown when one of these pests shows up. How I wish they and all the other tinpot dictators would stay home; and how glad I am that the Founding Fathers, in their infinite wisdom, moved the national capital from here to that dank miasmatic fen on the Potomac.

Comments (17)


You should move to England which as a wit remarked recently has become less monarchical than US.

pre-cut chicken breasts

I'm going to assume that since they're treating them like children they had the good sense to provide Tommee Tippee cups.

On second thought, it was rude not to provide plastic sporks so they could eat at a leisurely pace.


Madre de Dios, the Secret Service buys into that schoolyard cliche that all Puerto Ricans carry switchblades?

Had the hobo-diners at Fence on the Knoll been eating true to form we'd be outa 'Nam by now.

anne shew:

fork off means something a little different to my family , my mother's father would go around the table ( rushing us a little ) saying ..fork off ..( a no beating around the bush .. compared to the extremes of polite of my other grandf. already mentioned ) so that we would keep them from our plates ,lick them clean .. , and be ready for pie .. ( note -he was a grand recycler ,the best )


The reason for their knives being confiscated is that, upon listening to the interminable flow of presidential banalities, they may not be tempted to end their own lives in a desperate attempt at release. Not that the speaker would be particularly fazed, but it's rather bad PR.


Whereby the Goops , ...who lead disgusting (and deadly for the masses) lives , get rather paranoic about the sharpening of knives (and other implements: FORKS! ... of MASS DESTRUCTION!) by their billions of victims; despite the fact that if the Goops ' victims had been as murderous and deadly as those Goops are, those Goops , wouldn't be presiding over their victims lives.

(I’m pretty sure there’s an algebraic equation for my comment above, which would include an abundant use of zeros. We could ask those supporters of: math , science, ...The Cloud , ....puters -.... to the death of all else - Arne, Obama and pals, - but it’s likely that most of them, don’t have the first clue about algebraic equations, with perhaps, the exception of Lord Monster, Little Billy the Gatekeeper Pageboy. (Sorry if this post ends up in duplicate/triplicate: my first 2 tries didn’t appear to pass ‘software’ muster. In so very many respects, which so many have forgotten, It was never so hard to speak (and actually be heard) before Virtual World! NETROOTS! “reality.”))


it would have been wonderful had that captive audience pocketed the spoons and played a rousing version of musical spoons (two spoons, held back to back, in your dominant hand, bounced backed and forth off of your thigh and the palm of your less dominant hand, as a free percussion intrument),...evertime mother fucker opened his bought and ugly mouth.


I would have given my big toe for the chance to make that announcement: "Round up the silverware everyone, we have a negro coming to dinner! Make sure you count the towels in his room when he leaves."

A bit racist, but it would have been a sweet turnaround.


"Elected and Appointed Officials"

There's a difference?


appointed officials are the ones that dont clutter up your inbox with pleas for cash.


We are the Borg. You will be assimilated.

anne shew:

is someone missing the subtleties of smithing . .. .

Al Schumann:

Choad, all left wingers get their commentary from the Central Comment Committee. It's much easier that way.


So, after many likely lost their appetites at that din din, how was that uneaten food disposed of?

I have an aversion to plastics, that being said, I can’t help but wonder about the current Nanny State banning of plastic bags, which the Nanny State had absolutely no problem with, for decades; just like, for decades, millions, shopping in grocery stores, never threw those plastic bags out. They either recycled them, saved them for future purposes, but, PREDOMINATELY, used them to put their garbage in to save the high cost of huge garbage bags which needed to be tossed when they were only about ten percent full.

With the recent, and obscenely enormous, transfer of Home Ownership, to ‘Investor’ Ownership, the need for an enclosure of garbage for all those Home Owners now forced to rent (and worse: live on riverbanks, etc.,) has exponentially increased in an inverse relationship to the need for plastic bags.

I find it so typical that there has been an absolute absence of discussion about the fact that millions have been bagging their garbage in those same bags they brought their groceries home in (versus throwing out garbage in plastic bags which are quite expensive, and way larger than the garbage they hold), as renters are required to bag their garbage; an absolute silence as to whether major grocery chains are forced to minus the historic cost they’ve most surely included for the purchasing of those bags

I have absolutely no problem with carrying a reusable bag to ‘the store,’ what I do have a problem with, is the stunningly ugly con game of the Plastics Industry and the despicable bureaucrats who are in its hire. When I can, once again, buy food goods in glass – which, until quite recently, were historically enclosed in glass and, unlike plastics, can be reused for food goods when care is taken - I might believe that those bureaucrats were really against PLASTICS.

So telling that my recent trip to the produce market required me to purchase a bag, while the beer store, right across the street, on the same day, did not. So telling that those feeling the need to buy booze are those far more likely to have already given up on the BESTIAL $$$$UZ$$$$$ of “The Americas” ...and drop those plastic bags, either due to a stunning lack of garbage cans along the polluted river bank, homeless encampments they’ve been forced to inhabit, or in that welcomed numbed state which relieves them of the logical reality that their ‘leaders’ are actually monsters.

just saying .... and why .... why couldn’t there have been found a way to take glass back to grocery stores to refill, versus those nasty plastics?


(sorry, this was wrong:

the need for an enclosure of garbage for all those Home Owners now forced to rent (and worse: live on riverbanks, etc.,) has exponentially increased in an inverse relationship to the need for plastic bags.
has exponentially increased in an inverse relationship to the need for plastic bags.

there is actually a direct ... and corresponding .. relationship: with the need for bags to dispose garbage with when humans no longer own a residence, but have been forced into a transient survival ‘mode.’)

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