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The Quintessential Wingnut

By Al Schumann on Monday April 12, 2010 10:32 PM

The focus is on Democrats, I know, but from time to time I find a wingnut who could easily be a Democrat. This, is one.


If he weren't already merit class perfection, he's employed by Welfare Queen Headquarters.

Comments (21)


No Democrat would be bold enough for that haircut.

Al Schumann:

He could raise the tone of their trap. Especially if, as I suspect, he paints his ass purple.

Al Schumann:

By the way, you're right about the haircut. I checked a couple of Democratic "think tanks" to be sure. They all look like they've been nudged, severely, by fascist potty training supervisors.

These people are both better politicians than the Dims, but also much less visually conformist:


That fact is a true un-digestible mind-fuck to the pwog bog unintelligentsia.


It's like I've always said: the liberals are the real conservatives -- to the extent that anybody is.

Who was it that observed, "Washington is the Hollywood for ugly people"?


Oh no! I have Short Hair myself. And prefer conformist clothes.

But...my iPod is sure strange. So there!


""Washington is the Hollywood for ugly people"

Very very true, in my experience at least. Even in the supposedly hip areas like Columbia Heights there are just no good looking people.

There also seems to be a certain heft to just about everyone in DC, women included. They're not obese or anything, but most of the villagers seem to carry a consistent 10 to 20 pounds of extra baggage, from what I saw anyway.

Dude looks totally baked.

Al Schumann:

Ox, you're right, he does look baked. Pwogs tend to think of the wingnuts as hopelessly abstemious, and guilt-ridden over indulgence, but the modern winger is heir to the right wing hedonism of the sixties and seventies. Perhaps there's hope for them yet.

I like it when free marketeers have a marked resemblance to glinty-eyed Sawyer from "Lost."

When phenotype matches ideotype, the universe is in order.


Went looking for video of the guy. Curious about how many times per minute he strips that forelock out of his eyes and which hand he uses.

No luck but I found this 4 minute 22 second clip that did wonders for my understanding of CEI. Take a look. You may be amused.



The thing that always struck me about DC was the way all the young people seemed prematurely aged. You'd go to some hip-and-happening spot -- h&h by DC standards, of course -- and find the room full of male twentysomethings wearing shapeless sub-Brooks Brothers suits, and female ones in frumpy, fussy female versions of the same look -- sorry, I don't have the vocabulary to be more specific.

Worse even than the clothes was the body language and verbal style: stiff, constipated, arthritic gravitas, lots of abstract nouns, and liberal use of the passive voice, as if they were all trying to act like their Senator.

It was intensely creepy. You don't mind this sort of thing too much in a fifty-year-old baldy with a pot belly, but to see it on these fresh-faced, gym-toned kiddiewinks seemed terribly, terribly wrong. It was as if Ursula the Sea Witch had somehow imprisoned all these youthful bodies and minds in a repertoire of motions and gestures and turns of phrase taken from the ateriosclerosis set: you can be young in essence but never in action. Frightening, and deeply depressing.

Al's wingnut shown above is a considerable improvement. He may have the stupid suit and tie, but I agree about the state of bakery, and that, plus the wild hair, suggests there may be hope for him yet.

There are circles in which self-indulgence is far more to be hoped for than anything that we usually consider a virtue.

MJS, I left DC as soon as I could manage it, largely for the reasons you describe. I still remember going to parties at the invitation of friends who were Hill Rats of various levels in Potomac Prestige... the conversations at parties were hopelessly boring and careerist.

If you've seen the American movie version of State of Play, and watched the back and forth between junior staffers Chad and Liza, you get the idea.


I'm 52 and grew up in NY. The dude looks like his picture could have been clipped from the pages of my 1974 High School graduation yearbook. About three years post bar-mitzvah.

He looks like he is trying to look older than he is.

Judging from the description of him, this may be his first job. With worldly knowledge like that, why shouldn't he be making policy?

Anyway, he has already affected an hauteur with that arched eyebrow -- and an attitiude that would steamroll over any remnants of the working class in a mad march for the essential freedom for the propertied classes to have MORE.

Interesting that the group presents itself as environmentally friendly. With money, any sort of "extreme makesover" is possible.


at first I also thought that the lowered eyelids were a function of him trying to affect a supercilious air. I think it was the suit that threw me off.

Upon closed inspection through, I think that Oxtrot has it right with his stoner thesis:

- doesn't use hair conditioner
- doesn't use aftershave
- looks overweight for his frame (although this may just be the usual Potomac pudge that I referred to above, rather than being dank & dorito induced)
- works for a totally ghetto-ass thinktank whose offices are adorned with Goodfellas posters (see video)

Al Schumann:

In the world of psychoceramic wonk work, his employer strides proudly ahead of the rest; possibly assisted by superior marijuana.


"There are circles in which self-indulgence is far more to be hoped for than anything that we usually consider a virtue"

worth a second run


Wow. My hair looked exactly like that in my senior year college photo. Same length, shape, texture, same everything. Same fleshy pasty-face, too. Chances are good that I was baked, also. But I had the early Baudrillard and Workers Vanguard in my bookbag.

He looks like one of Alex's Droogs.


I looked at his profile. He's an asshole for opposing the minimum wage. However, his article against the abuse of eminent domain in Detroit was sensible:


I think he looks very sexy.

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