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Headlines of the future

By Owen Paine on Tuesday November 21, 2006 07:08 PM

From the Washington Post, sometime next spring:

Dogs and progs make it a hot time for the Dem headliners

Like the Light Brigade in Tennyson's wooden poem, will next spring find the house leadership of the Democratic majority charging ahead to nowhere, with 'cannons to the right of them and cannons to the left of them'? Will the progs and dogs be a-rippin' at 'em like hungry wolves trying madly to pull the caucus in opposite directions? Will some harried and frazzled party boss be saying "it's like nothin' seen around here in years -- hell it's like nothin' ever seen around here!"

Okay, okay -- I hear you all now: "No way, Paine, no way. At best, you're half right -- the blue dogs will come on like a pack of Cujos, okay -- but the prog fish? No way. Most caucus progs can't make water come out of a tap. They're just a bunch of violets waiting to bloom, a bunch of well-rewarded, righteous false hope mongers nestled up there on the hill in hot house comfort."

I agree -- no way have "they" got anywhere near belly fire enough to bite back at the "leadership" the way the blue dogs will. Recall the blue dogs got the votes to structure "an aisle crossin majority" (this is an obsession of Father Smiff's, of course). They can stage-manage the ancient forward motion stymie, that has roots running all the way back to the New Deal's second term. And also recall, their invisible chieftains are nicely embedded inside the right hump of the party's brokeback middle mountain -- yes of course I mean the Steny Hoyer and Rahmbo hump. Nancy's hump, the back hump, is a sure to freeze outfit, once the cross firing starts.

And the prog caboose? They'll squeeeeal like virgins at a Mayan sacrifice. Like my late pop used to say, trying to evoke the spirit of W C Fields -- "When you lope into your 50's you can expect to find a lot of deja vu waitin' for ya there."

Comments (4)

Well, hell; I guess it's "Am I The Only One Here" time again...ahem...

Am I the only one here who thinks that perhaps the reason that Progressive Democrats (imho a mythical creature, similar to a Gay Republican) and Greens haven't gotten anywhere is because there doesn't seem to be a single goddamn' one who's willing to fight this fight like they've got nothing to lose? Not willing to fight like an Iraqi Resistance fighter, not willing to fight like a Mexican at the barricades in Oaxaca, not willing to fight like a real guerrilla, a real revolutionary?

Maybe that's it. Maybe our problem is that we need some of what I like to call "political suicide bombers" -- someone who doesn't care about reputation or career, only about Revolution and the Resistance, someone willing to strap on the metaphorical dynamite belt, stride boldly into the allegorical Israeli shopping mall of Amerikan politics, shout out a Progressives' version of "Allah Is Great!" and then set off said metaphorical dynamite belt, causing extensive damage to the allegorical Israeli shopping mall and showering the survivors with metaphorical bloody shreds of flesh. Perhaps this might even need to happen several times, the way Che Guevara talked about "two, three, many Vietnams".

Where was is -- Illinois? -- where that Green Party Congressional candidate was polling so well that he was actually damn' near able to throw the seat to the GOP, sending a DP hack down in flames and at last putting the Fear Of God into the DP, and instead failed his gut check and ended up throwing his support to the DP candidate? At last, a real chance to teach these bastards a lesson and they throw it away. Goddamn' sissies; this is the kind of crap -- an almost-total lack of any of the kind of courage that's needed to bring about any real change -- that's totally destroyed my faith in the political system in this country, and in the country itself.

I voted Green in '96 (before it was dangerous), and again in '00 and '04. This was back when I was voting. Huh, screw that noise. What we need now is some people with the guts to "seize the plane", so to speak.


Mike F --

No, you're not the only one. Everything you said is quite correct. It's desperation that makes people bold -- the sense of having nothing to lose. And once you've become desperate yourself, it's hard to understand why everybody else isn't.

But it will happen, and old as I am, I don't at all despair of living to see it.

js paine:

yes yes yes
fire in the gut
back to the wall
pushed to the edge

we need leaders and exemplars
that get arrested
lose their "positions"
receive the pigeon droppings
on their heads
the tiny dung balls of elite scorn
mike baby we're all with ya here

may i suggest as always location numero uno

the f...ing job site

hit the trans nats right in the profit groin

can we the job chained
wealth bonded
do this ourselves ????

don't way for the translation
into prog speak

go for it

i call apon youth to be reckless

to make their shitty job sites
a scene of pre figurative rebellion

jobakazees attack
the corporate hive from within its confines

on analogy with the wobbly free speech movement
challenge the prevailing
"maus spracht "

more detail on this is availible on request
from the herb sorrell institute
att gale sondergaard

...At last, a real chance to teach these bastards a lesson and they throw it away...

Yep. That was pretty much my reaction, too. >:

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